Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Gérard du cinéma 2012 (French film awards) – "winners"


Loosely based on the Razzie Awards, the satirical Gérard du cinéma held their 7th awards ceremony last night at Théâtre Michel in honour of the worst in French cinema. They are usually held a day or two before either the César du cinema or the Festival de Cannes, which begins tomorrow. They have a lot more fun with the naming of the awards too, creating new categories every year. However, some of the awards this year smack vaguely of racism and Islamophobia.

The Gérard du film for worst movie was shared by the two competing remakes of earlier films based on Louis Pergaud's novel La Guerre des boutons (War of the Buttons). One was titled La Guerre des boutons while the other was called La Nouvelle Guerre des boutons but both used War of the Buttons as their English title. The films were released a week apart in September 2011 to poor critical and audience response.

Other notable awards include Jean Reno winning Desperate Actor for Comme un chef (The Chef), while the Desperate Actress prize went to Judith Godrèche for Low Cost. The Role of a lifetime prize was given to Pierre Arditi for his LCL commercial.

The Gérard du cinéma's award for worst kiss was called the Jérar du film tro golri :))) ROTFLOL !!!!!! XDDDD !!!!!!!!!! fo tro k jaille le voir av les soss, pke jkiff tro c jore de film c tro bi1 !!! MDRRRRR ma louloutte jte kiff kissoukissou !!! and was awarded to Florence Foresti and Jamel Debbouze in Hollywoo.

In a running joke, the award for Actress who benefits from the best contacts of her husband always goes to Arielle Dombasle. This year was the first, however, in which there was another nominee: Bérénice Béjo in The Artist. She is, of course, married to the director Michel Hazanavicius.

The Artist did pick up a prize, though, for Jean Dujardin in the category Actor who we hope you like a lot because you're going to see his face everywhere for the next thirty years.

The annual Gérard du cinéma is organized by journalists Frédéric Royer and Stéphane Rose, and television writer Arnaud Demanche. Previous years have seen awards for "French film released with an English title because you never know, on a misunderstanding, one can believe it's American", "Director who continues to make films with impunity despite an already pretty loaded resume", "Director who always makes ​​the same film, but a little worse each time."

---

Complete list of "winners" for the 7th annual Gérard du cinéma

Actor who we hope you like a lot because you're going to see his face everywhere for the next thirty years
Jean Dujardin in The Artist

Actor who would do well to stop acting and learn to just act
Anna Mouglalis in Chez Gino

Member of a duo who got it in the ass
Fred Testot

Movie with the sick, the handicapped, crutches, stretchers, wheelchairs, Actifed, Voltaren, Primperan, blood tests, sheets of repayment, temperature curves and meal trays with warm Macedonia. And a little Swiss cheese
Intouchables (The Intouchables) with François Cluzet and Omar Sy

Film so rich in sugar, honey and marshmallow if you're unlucky to have gotten popcorn, you're sure to puke in the bucket
Monsieur Papa (Mr. Dad) with Kad Merad

Actor who has an African given name
Sagamore Stévenin

Film that doesn't exist. Yet.
Tous Coupable (All Guilty) by Mathieu Kassovitz, with Mathieu Kassovitz

Old Robin Hood who should stop now. Or at least discharge his Robin Hood. But far. To Sherwood Forest, for example
Jean-Paul Rouve in Poupoupidou (Nobody Else But You)

Actress who benefits from the best contacts of her husband
Arielle Dombasle in Crédit pour tous (Credit for All)

Halal film
Beur sur la ville (Beur In The City) with Booder

Costume film that takes the jacket (fails)
Le Moine (The Monk) with Vincent Cassel

Cult actor who made good films. And then one day clearly, made shit
Jean-Pierre Bacri in Avant l'aube (The Night Clerk)

Role of a lifetime
Pierre Arditi in LCL

Jérar du film tro golri :))) ROTFLOL !!!!!! XDDDD !!!!!!!!!! fo tro k jaille le voir av les soss, pke jkiff tro c jore de film c tro bi1 !!! MDRRRRR ma louloutte jte kiff kissoukissou !!!
Hollywoo with Florence Foresti and Jamel Debbouze

Desperate Actress
Judith Godrèche in Low Cost

Desperate Actor
Jean Reno in Comme un chef (The Chef)

Film
La Guerre des boutons (War of the Buttons) and La Nouvelle Guerre des boutons (The New War of the Buttons) by Yann Samuell and Christophe Barratier, with Éric Elmosnino and Mathilde Seigner and with Lætitia Casta and Guillaume Canet

---

Complete nominations for the 7th annual Gérard du cinéma

Actor who we hope you like because you're going to see his face everywhere for the next thirty years
François Cluzet in Intouchables (The Intouchables)
Omar Sy in Intouchables (The Intouchables)
Joey Starr in Polisse
Gilles Lellouche in Infidèles (The Players)
Jean Dujardin in The Artist

Actor who would do well to stop acting and learn to just act
Tomer Sisley in Largo Winch 2 (The Burma Conspiracy)
Jean-Paul Rouve in Low Cost
Anna Mouglalis in Chez Gino
Éric Cantona in De force
Louis Garrel in Les Bien-Aimés (Beloved)

Member of a duo who got it in the ass
Fred Testot
Yvan Le Bolloc'h
Alexandra Lamy
Olivier Baroux
Kool Shen

Movie with the sick, the handicapped, crutches, stretchers, wheelchairs, Actifed, Voltaren, Primperan, blood tests, sheets of repayment, temperature curves and meal trays with warm Macedonia. And a little Swiss cheese
Intouchables (The Intouchables) with François Cluzet and Omar Sy
La guerre est déclarée (Declaration of War) with Jérémie Elkaïm
Lourdes with Sylvie Testud
Je n'ai rien oublié (I've Forgotten Nothing) with Gérard Depardieu
Ma compagne de nuit (My Night Companion) with Emmanuelle Béart

Film so rich in sugar, honey and marshmallow if you're unlucky to have gotten popcorn, you're sure to puke in the bucket
La Délicatesse (Delicacy) with Audrey Tautou
Ma part du gâteau (My Piece of the Pie) with Karin Viard
Le Fils à Jo (Jo's Boy) with Gérard Lanvin
Mon père est femme de ménage (My Father Is a Cleaning Lady) with François Cluzet
Monsieur Papa (Mr. Dad) with Kad Merad

Actor who has an African given name
Hippolyte Girardot
Sagamore Stévenin
Clovis Cornillac
Melvil Poupaud
Omar Sy

Film that doesn't exist. Yet.
Le Vélo rouillé (The Rusty Bike) by the Dardenne brothers, with Émilie Dequenne and Olivier Gourmet
Pa ni pwoblem by Lucien Jean-Baptiste, with Firmine Richard and Édouard Montoute
La Famille Rossignol (The Rossignol Family) by Christophe Barratier, with Gérard Jugnot, Kad Merad, Gérard Jugnot by Mathilde Seigner. And Gérard Jugnot.
Bisexuality Tokyo 2 AM de Christophe Honoré, with Louis Garrel et Chiara Mastroianni
Yakuza furious game by Olivier Megaton and Luc Besson, with Jason Statham, Jet Li and Louise Bourgoin
Tous Coupable (All Guilty) by Mathieu Kassovitz, with Mathieu Kassovitz
Moi (Me) by Frédéric Beigbeder, with Gaspard Ulliel and Pauline Lefèvre

Old Robin Hood who should stop now. Or at least discharge his Robin Hood. But far. To Sherwood, for example
Jean-Paul Rouve in Légitime Défense (Final Balance)
Jean-Paul Rouve in Low Cost
Jean-Paul Rouve in Les Tuche (The Tuche Family)
Jean-Paul Rouve in Poupoupidou (Nobody Else But You)

Actress who benefits from the best contacts of her husband
Arielle Dombasle in Crédit pour tous (Credit for All)
Bérénice Béjo in The Artist

Halal film
Beur sur la ville (Beur In The City) with Booder
Omar m'a tuer (Omar Killed Me) with Sami Bouajila
Halal police d'État (Halal Five-O) with Éric Judor and Ramzy Bédia
La Source des femmes (The Source) with Leïla Bekhti
Or noir (Black Gold) with Tahar Rahim

Costume film that takes the jacket (fails)
Henri IV with Julien Boisselier
Jeanne captive (The Silence of Joan) with Clémence Poésy
La Fille du puisatier (The Well Digger's Daughter) with Daniel Auteuil
Or noir (Black Gold) with Tahar Rahim
Le Moine (The Monk) with Vincent Cassel

Cult actor who made good films. And then one day clearly, made shit
Jean-Pierre Bacri in Avant l'aube (The Night Clerk)
Valérie Lemercier in Bienvenue à bord (Welcome Aboard)
Clovis Cornillac in Une folle envie (A Burning Desire)
Jean Reno in Comme un chef (The Chef)
Christian Clavier in On ne choisit pas sa famille (You Don't Choose Your Family)

Role of a lifetime
Jean Rochefort in Amaguiz
Alain Delon in Krys
Pierre Arditi in LCL
Charlotte Rampling in Allianz
Robert Hossein in Audika

Jérar du film tro golri :))) ROTFLOL !!!!!! XDDDD !!!!!!!!!! fo tro k jaille le voir av les soss, pke jkiff tro c jore de film c tro bi1 !!! MDRRRRR ma louloutte jte kiff kissoukissou !!!
Sur la piste du Marsupilami (On the Trail of the Marsupilami) with Jamel Debbouze andt Alain Chabat
Halal police d'État (Halal Five-O) with Éric Judor and Ramzy Bédia
Les Mythos with Stéphanie Crayencour
Hollywoo with Florence Foresti and Jamel Debbouze
Case départ (Back to Square One) with Thomas N'Gijol and Fabrice Éboué

Desperate Actress
Mathilde Seigner in La Guerre des boutons (War of the Buttons)
Monica Bellucci in Un été brûlant (That Summer)
Pauline Lefèvre in Voir la mer (See the Sea)
Judith Godrèche in Low Cost
Audrey Tautou in La Délicatesse (Delicacy)

Desperate Actor
Louis Garrel in Les Bien-Aimés (Beloved)
Franck Dubosc in Bienvenue à bord (Welcome Aboard)
Jérémie Elkaïm in La guerre est déclarée (Declaration of War)
Jean Reno in Comme un chef (The Chef)
Élie Semoun in L'Élève Ducobu (Ducoboo)

Film
Les Bien-Aimés (Beloved) by Christophe Honoré, with Louis Garrel
Comme un chef (The Chef) by Daniel Cohen, with Jean Reno and Michaël Youn
La Croisière (The Cruise) by Pascale Pouzadoux, with Charlotte de Turckheim
Hollywoo by Frédéric Berthe, with Florence Foresti and Jamel Debbouze
La Guerre des boutons (War of the Buttons) and La Nouvelle Guerre des boutons (The New War of the Buttons) by Yann Samuell and Christophe Barratier, with Éric Elmosnino and Mathilde Seigner and with Lætitia Casta and Guillaume Canet

No comments:

Post a Comment